“From the first day in school until the day I graduated, everyone gave me
one hundred plus in art. Well, where do you go in life?
You go to the place where you got one hundred plus.”
— Louise Nevelson, artist
It’s all about finding your place, Louise. I know this. But where is that place?
It’s Saturday morning. Today was my scheduled rematch with a crazed squirrel in a 5K that would finally allow me to regain species domination. But I still feel like a pack of his little squirrel friends were beating on me with tiny ball-peen hammers all night.
We awoke at 2 a.m. today in a ritual that is becoming too common. Watched a Northern Exposure DVD where they’re all going insane. Seemed perfectly normal. A bad sign.
I always had a fallback plan, Louise. Work, running, music. If all three were clicking I was in heaven. Two out of three, life was good. As long as one of them was there I could survive.
These days I’m 0 for 3. It’s not a great place.
I seem to have broken my hand a week ago in the Great Dumbbell Escapade, and it’s making no progress. I cannot grip my guitar with my left hand, which limits me to about four open-tuning songs that only require one finger. Running is increasingly an exercise in futility. And my job is finding a job, which is not a very fulfilling job. So here I sit.
I want one hundred plus. I long for that place where I can go and be great and happy and fulfilled.
What’s the answer, Louise?
“I never feel age … If you have creative work, you don’t have age or time.”
Mo has a sign in the middle of the living room wall that says simply “Make Art Anyway.” I guess I just stopped seeing it.
So easy. The artist’s version of a Nike slogan. It’s never too late. I may not feel well and my hand is broken, but I need never feel my age. I just have to find more creative ways to get back to the places where I got one hundred plus. Just do it.
I’m thinking it’s a fine day to write a couple of one-finger open-tuning songs.
And if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go see if the squirrel wants to go for a fun run.
Thanks, Louise. I’m glad we had this talk.
I think you should add Mo to your list. Work, running, music, Mo. One out of four is much less depressing than zero for three.
p.s. During my pre-midlife crisis I watched WKRP on DVD at 2 am. It’s good medicine.
Uh oh. you mean I may lose Mo TOO???? Now I’m really depressed. And I always had a hard time figuring out how WKRP filled 24 hours with two DJs. Unless it was all Free Bird and Stairway to Heaven all the time …
Every fallback plans needs one guarantee. The sure thing so you are never at zero. It’s like the university application safety school.
Les Nessman’s hog report filled a solid two hours each day. The trio -Stairway to Heaven, Free Bird, and I’d Do Anything for Love- accounts for another hour. Johnny’s uppers took care of the other 21.
Louise also said “I do believe that sound and color are great healers.”
Wow. Thanks for sending her my way.
John McCain says that it is always the darkest before everything goes completely black. Look where he ended up. Hang in there!