Bisquick as a long-run fuel

The ONLY long-run fuel endorsed by Betty Crocker. Need I say more?

You’re midway through your long run. You’ve burned off all available carbs. You’re at the point of cannibalizing your muscles. You need fuel. And fast. What’s the answer? Bisquick!

Bisquick on long runs? I know it’s a bit unconventional, but apparently it contains a pretty good ratio of fat to protein to carbs for long run fueling. You just carry the powder in a small pill bottle and then mix it in with your water.

6 grams fat, 25 grams carb, 3 grams protein, 490 mg sodium.

Sounds crazy? Compare it to Perpetuem, the longtime go-to powder for distance runners:
Perpetuem Caffé Latte
Supplement Facts
Serving Size: 69 g (Approx 2 Level Scoops)
2 Level Scoops: 106.0 cc = 7.2 Tbsp = 21.5 tsp
Amount Per Serving % Daily Value
Calories 270
Calories from Fat 20
Total Fat 2.5 g 4%*
Saturated Fat 0.5 g 3%*
Total Carbohydrate 54 g 18%*
Sugars 7 g
Protein 7 g 14%*
Calcium 36 mg 4%
Iron 2 mg 9%
Phosphorus 211 mg 21%
Magnesium 8 mg 2%
Manganese 1 mg 55%
Chromium 110 mcg 92%
Sodium 220 mg 9%
Potassium 120 mg 3%
Choline Bitartrate 50 mg

Bisquick gives you MORE fat, LESS protein, HALF as many carbs, and TWICE as much sodium. This means you get to consume TWICE as much on your long run. More yum on the run!

And unlike Perpetuem, Bisquick is not loaded down with chromium. I don’t know about you, but I’ve got enough problems on long runs without trying to digest extra chromium. I just don’t need to be shiny while running. And don’t get me started on Perpetuem’s chlorine bitartrate. Think back to the pioneers. Were they ingesting chlorine bitartrate while trotting across the New World? No. Biscuits? Heck, yeah. Case closed.

Plus, if you run at the proper speed on a hot day, it’s theoretically possible to actually MAKE BISCUITS during your long run. What could be more delicious than a steaming biscuit at the 18-mile mark?

Just dab a little jelly and butter behind your ears before the run, and you have breakfast to go. And carbs. And protein. And fat.

Compared to the prices of those hoity-toity mixtures, Bisquick is a steal. But don’t actually steal it. That would be wrong.

And the biggest plus: The name! bisQUICK! Doesn’t that just sound quick? What sounds faster? Perpetuem zzzzzzzzzzzzzz or bisQUICK!!!!! This is a name that is begging to go on a singlet. Or possibly a doublet.

I think this could be big. All we need now is some field testing. Let me know, and you could be a charter member of Team Bisquick. And remember: To Be Quick, Bisquick.

About gary

no sock monkeys were harmed in the making of this blog.
This entry was posted in running. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Bisquick as a long-run fuel

  1. tosuperstar says:

    What could be better than a biscuit at mile 18? Only one thing, pancakes at mile 23, with Aunt Jemima syrup of course. I would like to formally apply to be on team Bisquick, does that include a t-shirt?

  2. tosuperstar says:

    Only 199 more to go, I can’t wait!

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