Monthly Archives: September 2013

elevated flavor

Elevated flavor tastes suspiciously like fez monkey pee. (p.s. we just watched the “sun tea” episode of 30 rock, which confirms my suspicions.)

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it’s all for the vest

me: I think I’m switching back to the old running vest. mo: Why? me: I just realized that the phone pouch is far enough to the side that when I fall and crush my ribs, the phone will be OK. … Continue reading

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the keys to a good marriage, part 3

It all comes down to: when you get this message at work, always, always have an emergency chocolate bar stashed in the closet.

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if you know what i mean

I finally figured it out. I’m a walker. And that’s not a bad thing. I got out the metronome today, which sounds just enough like a cowbell that I seem to be strolling to the perpetual opening of “Mississippi Queen,” … Continue reading

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why i rarely go to starbucks

nice barista: What can I get you? me (reading from piece of paper): I’d like a double tall latte with an extra shot. nice barista: So you’d like a triple latte? me: I don’t know. This says double tall latte … Continue reading

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