So you’re out on a brutal cactus-laden trail run and you get ambushed by a cactus.

OK, so you’re sitting on a bench watching your dad walk down the street with his physical therapist. It’s still plenty dangerous.

And then disaster strikes. You are attacked by the cactus, leaving a gruesome scratch. Are your peeps, a motley pack of trail bums, impressed?


Um, not so much.

What to do? Mr. Pants advises a quick visit from your pal Mr. Heinz. The result: A gaping gash worthy of trail respect. Or at least a few french dries to dip.


Upside: You’re instantly a Cool Kid.

Downside: On the run later in the afternoon, your leg smells like catsup.  You spend the entire run wonder whether dogs like turkey legs with catsup.

Upside: Dog bite will look like wolf attack. More trail cred.

Running is easier than you would think.


About gary

no sock monkeys were harmed in the making of this blog.
This entry was posted in running and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s