I will never perform an exercise that requires kettlebells.

Two people were at the track today doing their Fancy Crossfit Exercises, and their Fancy Crossfit Kettlebells decided to live in lane 9. What is it with those things? Dumbbells aren’t smart enough for you? And just what is the appeal of upper body strength anyhow? Weirdos.

I will do the occasional pushup, and I carry the kitty litter from the store to the car to the apartment when the cat starts giving me the Stink Eye. That’s enough. Just run, people. Just run.

4.45 miles today. A one-hour record and fastest track mile (13:40) so sayeth Strava and therefore must not be doubted. Winter Olympics, here I come. If it’s above 70 there. I don’t have long pants.