i’m not an elephant

“The Elephant don’t do dope.”
— Deems

Nurse: I’m going to start you off with another round of steroids.

Me: Damn. There go my hopes of qualifying for the Olympics. Drug testing, you know.

Nurse: Aren’t they already over?

Me: No, they got postponed. Some virus has been going around.

Nurse: You’re not really aiming for the Olympics, are you?

Me: Well, I’m 64, I’m currently averaging a 15-minute mile and I am scared of needles, so I would be too scared to get the Olympic rings tattooed on my ankle. It’s highly unlikely.

Nurse: Oh.

Me: But now I have a good excuse. Damn steroids did me in. This is all your fault.

Nurse: Sigh.

It’s funny when you read the fine print on chemo. “Some side effects could go away after a year or two. Some may never go away.” Still, I guess that’s better than the alternative. AND they have free Lorna Doones, which again I failed to obtain. I hope my hilarious sense of humor returns eventually after this is over.

Two down, maybe 14 to go, depending on time off for good behavior? The chemo mambo is not for the impatient. Or the Olympic hopeful.

I hope they have punch cards so the 10th visit is free …

Today was the most beautiful day in the world, so naturally this was my view.
Upside: It’s a lovely hand sanitizer dispenser.

About gary

no sock monkeys were harmed in the making of this blog.
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