The facts as we know them:

■ A self-portrait of Frida Kahlo sold for
$34.9 million at Sotheby’s on Tuesday night.

■ I’m looking at two portraits of Frida
on the easel in our living room.

■ Downside: They may or may not have been painted by her.

■ Upside: No annoying Diego painted on her forehead.

Act now and these could be yours!
Just in time for the holidays!
Only $17 million (that’s right! HALF the price
of the “other” Frida portrait,
AND THERE ARE TWO OF THEM!!!

That’s not all!!! Use the code word
“I’mfairlycertainthisisascam”
and we’ll throw in the cupcake painting.
Call in the next 24 hours and we’ll even
send you the petrified cupcake!!!

“Frida is now on the wish list of collectors who collect
great masterpieces of modern art,” says Brooke Lampley,
Sotheby’s chairman. Surely there’s a collector on your list
who wants a masterpiece? Or an extremely old cupcake?

“There are probably less than 20 to 30 paintings
of hers on the market,”
says Gregorio Lake, former director of the Museum
of Latin American Art in California.
AND YOU CAN OWN TWO OF THEM!
The story doesn’t mention how many cupcake paintings there are
in the world, but there can’t be too many.
Difficult to paint a cupcake without eating it first.

BUT WAIT!!! You WANT the Frida-Diego combo?
We’ll throw in this handsome portrait
at no extra charge!!! An $8 value!

All this, for ONLY $17 million *.
This offer won’t last for long. Call now.


* plus shipping, handling and a Medium Chocolate Frosty.
(Offer not available for residents of Papua New Guinea)