Tag Archives: morning conversations
mo: i was just watching a movie about piranhas eating pizza. me: why would piranhas eat pizza? mo: not pizza. people. me: oh. my movie would’ve been more fun. now i want pizza.
“You can’t have huevos rancheros without eggs. This is caca blanco.” I hope she doesn’t say anything about my los cheerios.
nice woman pushing the buttons: “What floor?” me: “basement, please.” Nice woman pushing the buttons: stares at buttons for a full 30 seconds. “I don’t think there IS a basement.” me: “huh. well, first floor i guess. thanks.” nice woman … Continue reading
“i have this song stuck in my head. blah blah blah blah blah blah i gotta go.” i don’t think i’d want that song stuck in my head. but at least it’s easy to remember the lyrics.
mo: you’re in charge of the roast. all you have to do is turn off the oven at 2:00. me: should it catch fire? mo: no. and if it does, use baking soda. me: or chili powder? mo: baking soda. … Continue reading
mo: I’m on spotify. Who do you want to listen to? me: Jimmy Buffett. mo: Try again. me: Warren Buffett. mo: (a silence possibly indicating she is unimpressed with my musical prowess. Or my investment prowess. It’s hard to read … Continue reading